My Honest and Bitter-Sweet Reflection on Back-to-School

Here we are.  Just a few more days and this house will be a lot quieter.  Diego is off to 5th grade.  FIFTH GRADE!! This is his last year in elementary school.  My little man is becoming a man right before my very eyes and I'm not ready for that.  My little girl will be in school all day now too in 1st grade.  And, as much as I wished she was in full day kindergarten all of last year, I am going to miss having her here in the mornings.  I'm going to miss our car rides to the gym singing along to Ellie Goulding or having our own dance parties jammin' to Tiesto and Calvin Harris.  What can I say, she has good taste in music ;) 

This time of the year, I can't help but reflect on how they are doing and how I am doing as a parent.  I struggle with the usual and not so usual parenting woes.  Am I doing enough? Will they need therapy because of me? Are they being challenged enough? Will they follow their dreams? Am I a nagging mother? Do they know how much I love them? Why can't they just listen? Is it that hard to clean your room? Why do my kids fight?  Does it ever get easier?

I wish I had the answers to these questions.  I wish I could be carefree and easy going.  I want my kiddos to follow their path, but is it wrong to secretly hope it's close to the path I want for them? Being a parent is tough business.  Yes, it can also be rewarding and fun, but it's still really hard.  

I've always been a realist.  I enjoy being a mom, but I also enjoy having my own life.  I know it's healthy for them to interact with other kids their age and I know I need my space too, especially since I mostly work from home.  Having them around all day is challenging and I am no good at the home-work life balancing act.  So while I won't be a hypocrite and say I wish they didn't have to go to school, a part of me is kinda sad to see them go.  A part of me wishes I was that parent that could home school and work from home and have a clean house....But, the realist knows that won't work.  The realist in me knows I am looking forward to a new and uninterrupted work schedule (more on that next week!).  I am looking forward to this new chapter in our family life.  WIth our changing routine, I am looking forward to getting myself better organized so that I can be a better parent to them.  Here's to a new school year and all that comes with it!  The good and the not-so-good!  

Tell me, how are you feeling about your little ones going back to school? Were you happy? Sad? A little bit of both?  How will you be tackling the new school year?